Communication..Have you ever thought about this: How good are your communication skills?
Maybe you need to try harder to understand?
Maybe you need to speak more clearly?
The biggest problem between two people is not distance but a lack of good communication?
You know that song: Walking In My Shoes?
Instead of building and nurturing our relationships (with friends, partners, colleagues..) by improving ourselves and our communication skills, we give up, using endless excuses like: distance, no time, he/she is hard to understand, fear of someone’s strength.. etc etc.
Why does this happen?
People very often don’t listen to understand, but to reply and give their opinion. This shows a lack of respect, empathy and emotional intelligence.
People often want to be right rather than compassionate. Ego problem. It would be much easier to understand that we all have our realities and our truth. Instead of trying to always be right, try to understand. Again.. this happens when we don’t have the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.
People are very quick to judge others before getting to know that person. Among all of the above is also a lack of education.
People very often say things they don’t feel just because they want to please others. But your energy reveals you, don’t forget that. A lack of self love & respect and respect for others.
On the other hand people tend to hide their feelings becase they fear rejection.
Aaand so on..
Why is it easier to make excuses instead of improving ourselves and relationships with people we care about? Be honest with yourself. Speak with that voice within you and never be afraid to say it out loud. It is very important to speak how we feel. For so many reasons. Don’t be afraid of rejection, learn how to accept it.
The most important thing is that you gave yourself 100% and you will avoid all those questions like.. what if? It leads to overthinking. And we all know that overthinking is not good at all.
The worst distance between two people is misunderstanding. So if you care, try harder and work on yourself. Those who want respect, they give respect. Those who want to be understood they try to understand. Don’t forget when you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
So instead of blaming others, let us try asking ourselves (as usual):
Am I a good listener?
Am I clear enough when I speak?
Am I open minded in order to accept others people realities and opinions about the same thing?
Do I respect other people’s feelings, especially if they are different than mine?
Am I interrupting them while they are talking to me?
Am I honest with that person who I am speaking to?
Am I kind with my words?
Treat others how you want to be treated.
Let us not forget that also speaking the truth isn’t just telling the truth. What matters is HOW you say it regardless how harsh it might be. Think about the other person’s feelings. Speak to others the way you would want to be spoken to.
Your body language, gestures, energy, tone of your voice, eye contact.. speak instead of your words. All of these have to be in harmony. Your feelings (heart) with your thoughts and words (mind), and your body language will follow. That’s the key and then you will know that you are good with communication skills. Empathy.. oh so important: Don’t do unto others what you would not have done unto you!
Try to speak with your heart and mind. Open your heart & mind. The mind is a very powerful tool.. so learn how to control it as with your ego.
I have that urge to speak how I feel. I know, I know, those of you who know me will say: Oh Irina, really? We didn’t know that. 😁 If I don’t, something inside hurts me. I feel like an elephant is sitting on my chest. So over time I have learned to speak everything, all those things that seem stupid or not, they are important. Oh sure they are important if your whole body inside is screaming to do that. So, it has to be said.
Me, now I am going to say to people that I care, that I love them. It is something I am practicing in last two years, since I wasn’t so open to do that before, even if I felt it deeply. Let’s say I was shy.